


Crazy Life

by MagicClem



Category: Sense8 (TV)
Genre: Developing Relationship, F/M, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Introspection, M/M, Multi, Not Beta Read, OT3, POV Rajan Rasal, Polyamory, Threesome - F/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-27 06:04:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17156615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagicClem/pseuds/MagicClem
Summary: Rajan would admit that this past few years had been crazy and life seems determined to make it crazier and crazier.Or: This is "Amor Vincit Omnia" from Rajan's perspective.





	Crazy Life

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AnnabethBarnes](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnabethBarnes/gifts).



> Merry Christmas y'all! This is another fic written for AnnabethBarnes' birthday (which was a while ago but who's counting?). 
> 
> Anyway, this ship is the best thing that ever happened in the history of television and I will never be over how amazing it is! I hope you'll enjoy it!

Rajan would admit that this past few years had been crazy and life seems determined to make it crazier and crazier. It started with his wedding with Kala, which at the time had felt like the craziest thing imaginable, because for the first time in his entire life, he had ignore what his father wanted him to do and he made a decision for himself. But things just got crazier from there. First of all, his marriage was more complicated than what he had expected, which was not bad, just… well unexpected. He sometimes felt like Kala didn’t want to be here but when he had offered her a way out of it, she refused. And sometimes, it felt like she wanted to be here and it was confusing. After that, he got involved in an investigation against one of his oldest friend, Ajay Kapoor and it had felt like his life couldn’t get crazier than this. He lived with a constant death threat over his head and he decided it would be best to send Kala away for a while. He knew that their marriage may not survived this new problem but at this moment, he didn’t care because he could live in a world where Kala was not his wife but the idea of her being in danger because of him was unbearable. And then thing got even crazier.

 

It starts with a medical organisation called the Biologic Preservation Organisation, or BPO who comes to see him and Kala’s family. Apparently, Kala has a decease, a very rare one and needs medical help immediately or she could die. The idea of his wife being in danger is terrible but Rajan has to admit that something is off about this organisation. First of all, he never heard of them and since he works in the same field, it’s weird in itself. Kala also seemed fine when she left (which he knows does not mean she is fine but still) and most important, Kala would have told him if she had some doubt about her health (at least, he hopes she would). At the same time, he does remember that she wanted to talk to him about something before she left and maybe that was it. He has to be sure, which is why he doesn’t tell BPO where she is and instead, he jumps on the next plane direction Paris to go find her.

 

Rajan doesn’t know what he is expecting to find in Paris. What he sure is not expecting is to find a shirtless mexican man, an asian woman in the kitchen, a group of people he has never seen in his life and among them, his wife who looks surprised to see him here. His beautiful, smart, maybe ill wife. He decides to focus on her for now. He explains to her why he is here and he sees the look on her face when he mentions a medical organisation. She looks worried.

« What organisation? » she asks in english, which is weird in itself.

« I don’t remember the name, only three letters… BP… »

I can even finish because there is a knock on the door and the strangers start to move, taking bags. One of the stranger has a gun and he doesn’t even have time to panic before his wife gives him some medical equipment and they all head to the roof.

« Kala, who are these people? Have you join some insane cult? »

« Rajan, if I’m caught by those men they will kill me. Come on. »

It is enough for him to, at the very least, follow them. They don’t go very far anyway, because two of the strangers run back into the apartment. When he arrives, they are cops on the floor and one of the stranger tells them to take as much as they can before leaving again and that’s the moment when Rajan decides that enough is enough.

« I’m not going anywhere until someone tells me what the hell is going on here! »

Kala looks at him and tells him

« Rajan, I promise you, I’ll explain everything, but first, we need to leave this place. »

He wants to object but she has this look in her eyes and Rajan knows this is not a discussion so he just accepts this deal. It’s better than nothing anyway.

 

To be fair, Rajan doesn’t know what Kala is going to explain to him but whatever he imagined, the actual explanation is crazier. So, apparently, his wife is another species of human being called « homo sensorium », they are born in cluster and are telepathically connected, his wife has now 7 others persons in her brain and one of them is called Wolfgang, he is german and was kidnaped by BPO (at least, Rajan was right not to trust them), when they torture him, the others can feel it. And Kala doesn’t explain this part to him (probably because they are in public, at least, he hopes it’s the reason), but it’s obvious that her relationship with this Wolfgang is more intimate than with the others. He can see it in her eyes and in the way everyone looks at her when they mention Wolfgang. Rajan doesn’t know how to feel about that. He knows he is supposed to be upset because his wife is (very likely) cheating on him but strangely, he is not. Maybe it’s because he just learned something that changes his vision of life completely and something as small as his wife cheating on him seems meaningless in comparison or maybe it’s because he is just not very surprised by the news or maybe it’s because he is clinging to the hope that he is wrong or maybe it’s because it doesn’t matter what is the nature of their relationship because what really matters is that this man is in danger and that Kala, his wonderful wife, can feel his pain and he loves her too much to leave her alone now and do nothing about it. So when Kala tells him she understands if he wants to leave, he just reassures her: she is in danger and he won’t leave her alone now. The future of their marriage might be unsure but right now, he is still her husband and it is his duty to help her no matter what. He loves her anyway, it’s not like he has any other choice. She smiles at him, tells him she married a good man and she kisses him. And for once, it feels like she means it.

 

They don’t really have time to discuss for the rest of the day because they have a lot to plan apparently. Rajan is trying to help as much as he can and finding a big enough place for 13 people is a good start. He doesn’t understand the whole situation. What he knows is that they keep a man prisoner in the basement and he really wants to be horrified by this but every time he learns something knew about this man (he is the reason why Wolfgang is tortured, he hunts and kills people like his wife and her friends, Will was forced to become an heroin addict in order to protect the others from him) and it’s hard to feel bad about it. It’s only when it’s time to go to sleep that he finally has some time alone with Kala (even if he understands that in Kala’s case, « alone » is never really accurate). They are both laying in their bed and he feels that Kala is agitated. Finally, she says:

« Rajan, there is something else I need to tell you. »

He turns his head to look at her but she is not looking at him. Her eyes are on the celling and he knows what she is going to say. Still, he lets her speak.

« I know this might come as another shock for you. I wanted to tell you sooner but I didn’t think it was fair to tell you that in front of everyone, especially since it’s a more personal matter and… »

« Kala, breathe. »

He knows his wife rambles when she is nervous and he knows that if he doesn’t stop her from talking, he might fall asleep before hearing what she wants to tell him.

« It’s about Wolfgang, » she says. "It’s… We are… He is… »

« Your lover, » Rajan says, because he sees his wife struggling with words and he knows what she is going to say anyway.

His answer seems to surprise her because she finally turns her head towards him.

« You knew? »

« I figured. »

« How? »

« The way everyone look at you when they talk about him. The way you look when you talk about him. »

« You don’t sound mad. »

« Probably because I’m not mad. »

This answer confused her. He doesn’t blame her, he is very confused himself. Even with the confirmation, he still isn’t mad. If his father was here, he would probably scream at him for that, telling him he is stupid and should be mad and that he knew this woman was trouble and the he should never have married her. But his father isn’t here, Rajan isn’t mad (nor stupid) and even knowing this, he cannot bring himself to think the marriage was a mistake. He knows Kala, well, clearly not as much as he though but still, he knows her. She is gentle, kind and would never want to hurt him or anyone else. And he can’t blame her for thing she has no control over. Especially when the lover is telepathically connected to her.

« Listen Kala, this is confusing, I’m not going to lie, but I am not mad. I don’t know how I feel about it honestly. But what I said earlier hasn’t change. I love you and I’m going to help you. »

She doesn’t say anything but she moves closer to him and falls asleep, her head on his chest and he thinks that he can be happy with that for now.

 

It might sounds strange but learning that his wife is another kind of human being and that she has a lover actually brought them closer together. After that, his wife is often with him, she always includes him and explains things to him. He also notices that she shows him affection in a more physical way : she is always touching his arm or his shoulder, she takes his hand for no reasons and every time they kiss, it feels real. She had never been like that during their marriage and he is not complaining but he is confused because their relationship has never been better and he wonders what will happen when Wolfgang is rescued. The best thing is to just not think about it.

 

The rescue is supposed to happen in a club. Him and Kala are there, pretending to be just another couple, ready to intervene if they are needed. They are dancing, which is nice and would be nicer if it wasn’t a mission to rescue her lover.

« See this woman? Keep us close. »

The woman in question is beautiful and she looks dangerous. In front of her, there is a man in handcuff and Rajan guesses this must be Wolfgang. He cannot see him very clearly and he is too focused on the mission to really take the time to look at him anyway. When he sees the woman pointing a gun, he tells Kala who immediately jumps to stop her. It doesn’t seem to work and Rajan doesn’t hesitate before doing the exact same thing. Everything happens so fast and before he knows it, he lost Kala but Wolfgang is with him and they leave the club together. Once they are in the van, Will takes his handcuff off and Riley immediately hugs him and tells him something Rajan can’t hear (and Rajan probably wouldn’t understand the language anyway). He sees Wolfgang soft smile while he hugs her back. Then, they all sits. Wolfgang tells him that Kala is with Hernando, Lito and Daniela and Rajan feels calmer knowing she is safe. Now that they are more or less safe, Rajan finally takes time to look at Wolfgang. He has to admit that he is handsome. He can understand why Kala would fall for someone like him.

 

Everyone who is in the van (Will, Riley, Wolfgang, Capheus and Rajan himself) decide to go to the meeting point while everyone else agree they should stay in Paris for the night and join them the next day. The rendezvous is the house of one of Rajan’s old friend, Jean-Pierre. He hopes they won’t ask to many questions about him, because Rajan isn’t sure he wants to explain who is Jean-Pierre exactly. He is not sure he could explain it himself. It was complicated.

 

Another thing that Rajan would qualify as « complicated » is Wolfgang. He doesn’t speak much, which is understandable considering he had been kidnaped and tortured recently and has been free for not even 3 hours. Everyone here is tired so Rajan just lets them pick a room and go to sleep. He isn’t tired thought, so he just stays in the kitchen with a cup a tea. When he hears someone, he turns and sees Wolfgang.

« Cannot sleep either? » the german man asks.

Rajan just shakes his head. He offers him some tea but the others man refused.

« I wanted a cigarette. Had to stole one from Riley. »

He opens a window and sits next to it and starts his cigarette. Rajan is trying very hard not to stare at the man and he is failing miserably. If Wolfgang notices, he is polite enough to not say anything but he probably doesn’t notice because he looks like he is not really there. He looks like Riley when she was visiting Mister Hoy. Wolfgang is probably visiting someone and this someone is probably Kala. It’s fascinating, the way he looks at this moment, his eyes looking nowhere but his face is soft and Rajan can’t look away. Rajan really wanna talk but he doesn’t know what to say. In the end, he just says:

« Is she alright? »

Wolfgang looks in his direction and smiles.

« Yes, she is fine. »

They don’t say anything else but the silence is oddly comfortable.

 

The next day, everyone start to arrive at the house. Nomi and Amanita arrive with their van, Lito, Hernando and Daniela arrive in a taxi and Sun arrives with someone he doesn’t know and she introduces him as « detective Mun ». Everyone in the cluster immediately goes to greet him, like they all know him and maybe they do. He can hear Riley asking him how he feels about the situation and after that, Rajan isn’t really listening. He is waiting. He sees Wolfgang coming to him with a bottle of wine. He pours some of it in his glass and says:

« They’ll be here soon. »

Rajan just nods, expecting the discussion to end there but Wolfgang adds:

« Rajan… most men wouldn’t have done what you did to for me. »

« I did what I could, » he says nervously.

« I’ll never forget it. »

The look in Wolfgang’s eyes is so intense at this moment that Rajan doesn’t know what to say and he feels something all too familiar in his stomach and his heart beats a little faster and Rajan immediately pushed those feelings away. Instead, he just smiles at Wolfgang and pats his shoulder.

 

When Kala finally arrives, Rajan is more than nervous. He doesn’t know what his wife will do. Will she go straight to Wolfgang? It would be understandable after everything and Rajan is surprised by the lack of negative feeling about the idea. But Kala is a surprising woman and she goes to him first and she kisses him, like she never kissed him before. She looks at him in the eyes and when she says « Rajan you’re so much more than the man I though I married », he understands that what she is really saying is « I’m starting to fall in love with you » and Rajan couldn’t be happier. She hugs him and then, she leaves him and goes to Wolfgang (he wouldn’t even be surprised if their reunion started even before that in their head) and she kisses him. Wolfgang lifts her off the ground and Rajan is really surprised by how okay he is with this. They look good together and more important, his wife looks happy and the only thought of her happiness is enough to make the situation fine.

 

The weird part of the whole thing is that they don’t even talk about it. There is a implicit understanding between the three of them that whatever is going on, it’s fine. More than fine even. Kala is glowing, she seems more relaxed at this simple dinner then she has been since their wedding and Rajan cannot help but wonder if it’s because of Wolfgang or because she finally can be truly herself without judgement. In both case, this carefree attitude looks good on her.

 

Sadly, this sweet break is over too quickly. Someone named Bodhi visits the cluster and after that, they have to go to Naples to stop Whispers. Rajan doesn’t remember who this Bodhi person is or even if she was mention before, but he knows Whispers is dangerous and it’s the most important part. Wolfgang calls his best friend Felix and Will calls his best friend Diego because they are going to need as much help as they can get for this. While Wolfgang is on the phone, Kala sits next to him and takes his hand in hers. It is getting late and soon they will go to sleep and the next day, they will leave the place. Kala looks tired and that’s when Rajan says:

« You know, I have been thinking. I think I’m going to sleep on the couch tonight. »

Kala is too smart to not understand the real meaning behind these words. She looks at him with surprise in her eyes and he can’t blame her. He has been thinking about this since she arrived earlier that day (maybe even before that) but he is surprised that he actually said it out loud.

« Are you sure? » she asks.

He just kisses the top of her hands and nods. Yes he is sure. This situation is complicated to say the least but after everything they been through recently, Rajan feels that Kala and Wolfgang need some time alone. Rajan is still very surprised by how well he is dealing with the situation and by the lack of jealousy he feels. Kala smiles, then kisses him softly and rests her head on his shoulder. They have never share that much intimacy and at this moment, Rajan thinks he has never been more in love with her. And isn’t strange to think like that just after telling her that he was fine with her spending the night with her lover. Not for the first time recently, he thinks his life can’t get crazier.

 

Wolfgang is supposed to meet Felix near Naples. It means that Wolfgang needs to go there by car, which is not a problem because Jean-Pierre has three cars here and he allowed him to used them « as long as he takes care of them ». The moment Capheus sees the car, he decides he wants to drive and no one will stop him. Wolfgang going in a car means that Kala will go with him and this means that Rajan will go with her and before they even realise it, the four of them are in a car direction Naples. Kala and Wolfgang are in the backseats and Rajan thinks he would like to get to know Capheus better but he soon realises it is not easy to talk to someone in a convertible. The trip is actually fun and even if Naples isn’t very close, they do have a good time, listening music and just, enjoying the landscapes. When they arrive at the meeting point, Rajan sees a man sitting on a car and Wolfgang gets out of the convertible before the engine are even turned off. The two men hug, clearly delight to see each other. They probably speak german because Rajan can’t understand them. Capheus hugs the man, who looks a little bit confused. He then turns to Kala and says in english:

« And you must be Indian Plan. »

He sees Wolfgang nods and Rajan wonders what is the story behind « Indian Plan ».

« I’m Kala. It’s nice to finally meet. »

« Yeah. Good to meet you too. »

« And I’m Rajan. »

Felix shakes his hand with a bright smile but when Kala tells him that he is her husband, he looks at Wolfgang with confusion in his eyes. Wolfgang just shrugs with a smile.

« It’s complicated. »

And it’s a good way to describe the situation. If Felix has questions, he doesn’t ask them. Instead, he shows them all the weapons he brought with him from Berlin, including a rocket launcher, which he qualifies as Wolfgang’s « favourite toy » and Rajan is more intrigued by the man than he was before. Then, they have to leave to go to Naples and Wolfgang tells them he will finish the trip with Felix. Rajan and Kala get back inside their car, in the backseats and Capheus drives (and quite honestly looks like he is having the time of his life, he clearly loves this car). His arm is around Kala. At some point, he senses her getting tense.

« What is wrong my love? »

« Wolfgang is visiting Lila. »

Lila is the woman they saw in the club, he remembers. She is dangerous. But the expression on Kala’s face looks like jealousy.

 

They arrive in Naples before the others and they decide to get a pizza. It’s a nice break but soon enough, they have to join the others. Kala is the one telling them they have to leave:

« Riley and Sun have found Puck, we are supposed to meet him to plan something. »

« Who is Puck? » Rajan asks.

Kala doesn’t answer but the look on her face says so many thing. Wolfgang turns to him and say:

« Once, Riley called him the ”equivalence of a sensate STD”. »

The comparison makes Felix laugh and makes Rajan smiles. He sounds like quite a character.

 

Somehow, Hernando has a crazy idea to get into the place where Whisper is. The idea implies that they need to buy a bus. It’s cheaper than renting it, especially since a part of the plan is making the bus explode. They find one and Kala, his brilliant chemist wife makes something in order to make the bus explode. Riley looks at her with a soft smile and says to Rajan:

« She is really good at making thing explode. She blew up a car once, with only gas and a lighter. »

Rajan isn’t sure what it says about his life that this information doesn’t even surprise him. He watches his wife finalised their bomb and once again, he thinks that at this point, his life really cannot get crazier.

 

Somehow though, things do get crazier. He is with his wife when she shoots someone.

« My wife! You’re a killer! »

Kala looks at him a little shocked, with a small smile and apologises, as if she didn’t just save the both of them. He picks up a gun on the ground and looks at her.

« Can you teach me? »

And it’s his wife in front of him, her eyes, her hair, her body but the smile she makes is Wolfgang’s. It’s her voice that explains to him that he took a taser and then explains to him how to use a gun but he knows it’s Wolfgang who is talking. It is a weird feeling, seeing his wife but knowing it’s not her.

 

And then, his wife and him get separated and he hears a gunshot and when he gets inside the room, there is Wolfgang crying on Kala’s body and he knows and the world falls apart around him. His wife can’t be dead, he can accept everything in the world but not this, everything but this. He is crying when he hears Wolfgang saying:

« You’re alive. »

And then, they just work together to save her life.

« Her heart, it’s not beating, » he says, tears in his eyes.

That’s when Rajan thinks about the taser. He runs to the taser and then, he runs back to her. And when he sees her comes back to life, the only thing he can feel is relief at the sign of her eyes being open, of her chest moving up and down. Wolfgang kisses her, then she kisses him and this is the best kiss they ever shared because he thought for a moment that he lost her forever but she is here, breathing and kissing him. Wolfgang and him take her to the hospital and then, they can just wait. At some point, Wolfgang tells him they killed Lila and Whispers and Rajan is glad to hear the news, even if he is more preoccupied by Kala’s health.

 

Wolfgang and Rajan are at her bedside when she wakes up and she smiles at them both. It’s a weak smile but it’s a smile nonetheless. She has to stay at the hospital for at least a week. That’s the moment when the rest of the cluster cannot stay in Naples. They all visit at least once. Nomi and Amanita have to go back to Paris to start planing their wedding and Bug is coming with them. Rajan gives them his key for the apartment, Kala still has her own and they need a place to stay. Hernando, Daniela and Lito leave because Lito is supposed to shoot a movie in Los Angeles. Sun and Mun have to deal with Sun’s trouble with the justice. Both Diego and Felix were hurt during the shooting but their wounds are actually very superficial, so they go back to their cities. Will and Riley also have to go back to Paris and Rajan asks them if they can get Jean-Pierre’s car back, which they accept with a smile. Capheus has to go back home because apparently he is running for political election in his country. Before leaving, he asks to speak to him. He explains the medical situation in his country and Rajan remembers that time when he fought with Kala about how his company was selling expired drug to others countries and he feels terrible for ever participating in this. Capheus must know about it too (he remembers Kala mentioning Kenya during this fight, he understands why now) but he doesn’t seem mad. Instead, he just asks if Rajan would be willing to help if Capheus won the election.

« I have to admit, it would also be great because it would give me a good excuse for leaving my home for a few weeks. »

Rajan is happy to accept, not just because it’s the right thing to do but also because Capheus is part of Kala now and he would do anything for Kala, so it’s logical that this extend to everyone in the cluster now.

 

So in the end, it’s only him, Wolfgang and Kala in Naples. Rajan and Wolfgang have to stay in a hotel. Wolfgang actually convinces him to share a room because it’s cheaper, even when Rajan argue that it’s not really a problem and Rajan ultimately just gives in. They don’t share a bed though and Rajan doesn’t know why he is so disappointed at this idea. He tries to convince himself that it’s because he doesn’t like being alone but he knows the excuse is flimsy so he just pushes the feeling away and ignores it, like he does so well. Wolfgang and him spend a lot of time together because they can’t stay at the hospital all the time and Rajan actually likes spending time with him and not just because of Kala. Wolfgang is not the most talkative guy but there is something nice about just existing around him, it’s comforting. They talk sometimes, mostly about Kala at first, because it’s the one thing they have in common, but they find other subject of discussion and Rajan likes talking to him, it’s just surprisingly easy. The more he spends time with him, the more he understands why Kala is in love with him, apart from his good look. More than once during this week, he finds himself looking at Wolfgang for no apparent reason. He recognises the feeling and the thought terrifies him. He can hear his father’s voice in his head, telling him this is disgusting and he is a disgrace. He heard those words once before, when his father learned about his « complicated » relationship with Jean-Pierre. So Rajan does what he always did since that day, he pushes the feelings away and tries to pretend they don’t exist.

 

They leave Naples as soon as Kala can leave. They take a train back to Paris, where they meet with Nomi, Amanita, Bug, Will and Riley. They all stay in his apartment. He thinks about the day he arrived in Paris and found them here, he think about his confusion. It was maybe three weeks or a month ago but it feels like a lifetime ago. The flat isn’t that big and they have to organised who sleep where. Will and Riley have their room, Amanita and Nomi theirs, Bug sleep on the couch and somehow, Rajan ends up sleeping with Kala and Wolfgang. They don’t even discuss it, it just sort of… happens. Not that he is complaining about it. Rajan tries not to think about it too much and he tries to convince himself that he just doing this for Kala but really, he isn’t fooling anyone, especially not himself. He likes sleeping with them, more than he probably should.

 

They don’t really talk about what exactly they are doing with this relationship and Rajan knows they should because things keep getting more complicated but they don’t have the time. Or really, they don’t take it. Rajan tries to work on the company from Paris, because he had to neglect his work with the whole « helping my wife and her friends with the evil organisation hunting them » situation but now, he has to get back to work. Wolfgang and Kala help Nomi and Amanita with the wedding. He spends a lot of time with everyone and he gets to see more of them. He gets to know the cluster better (well, the one who are here at least) and it’s nice to get to know them in a normal situation. They told him stories about how they lived since they were reborn sensates. Some are crazy and impressive (like when the whole cluster teamed up to save Riley in Iceland), some are mind blowing (like when they tell him how they all experienced the memory of being born), some are cool (like when Lito helped Wolfgang killing his cousin and Rajan has so many questions he doesn’t ask), some are funny (he has to admit that his « funniest honeymoon story » is even funnier with the context). He likes hearing their stories. He spends more time with his wife now that she is free of problems and now that there is no lies between them and Rajan feels like he is falling in love with her all over again and it’s the best feeling. He gets to see more of Wolfgang, who is more comfortable around the rest of the cluster, he smiles more, he is more open, he looks happy and Rajan tries very hard to ignore whatever he might be feeling because he knows that once he will look at it, once he will acknowledge it, there will be no turning back and he is not ready. He gets to see Wolfgang and Kala together more and sometimes, it’s too much for Rajan. It’s not that he is jealous, because really, he is not jealous. They just look good together, they look like they are in their own world and Rajan wonders where he fits in this dynamic. Are they staying around him because they don’t know how to tell him to leave or do they want him here? He knows the best way to know would be to just talk about it but Rajan has to admit he is afraid of the answer. He is afraid that they would want to leave him and he is afraid that they would want to stay. Rajan is confused to say the least.

 

The wedding is beautiful. It’s on the top of the Eiffel Tower which is, in itself amazing. He gets to meet many people like Nomi’s sister or Capheus family. Capheus also introduces him to the people who work on his political campaign and they thank him for his future help. The wedding ceremony in itself is wonderful. Nomi and Amanita’s love is so obvious and beautiful, it’s hard not to feel emotional. He is holding his wife hand and at some point, he notice she is also holding Wolfgang’s hand and it makes him smile. The party after the ceremony is amazing. He dances with Kala, Kala dances with Wolfgang, Wolfgang dances with him and they all dance together and their relationship might be complicated but this is fun.

 

When Nomi and Amanita leave the party to get back to their room, he notices how everyone in the cluster and their partners leaves. Kala finds him and takes him back to their room. He wants to ask her where is Wolfgang, but she doesn’t let him speak and then, they notice him in their bed. He pats the bed, looking at them with want and with a smile that make Rajan wants to kiss him. Kala looks at him, with the same want in her eyes, not talking but still asking him « is it ok? ». He can still say no but he wants it and the champaign they drank tonight makes him braver and he says yes. And the moment Wolfgang joins them, kisses Kala who kisses him back and then kisses Rajan too, the moment Wolfgang rips his shirt off, the moment Rajan lips touch Wolfgang’s, Rajan just gives in. All the feelings he tried to repress during all those weeks just come back, hit him in the face but these feelings with both of them are so wonderful that he doesn’t even think about it.

 

Rajan is the first one to wake up the next morning. Kala and Wolfgang are still asleep, they look peaceful and so beautiful in their sleep. Last night was a dream come true, a fantasy Rajan never allowed himself to even imagine and still, it happened. But now, it’s the morning, the alcohol that made him braver last night is out of his system and his courage is gone, he is just scared suddenly. He looks at his beautiful wife. Their marriage is far from conventional but he has to admit he has never been happier and he has never been more in love with her. And Wolfgang next to her. Rajan had tried to deny it, to ignore those feelings but last night, finally, he surrendered to them but only now does he realises what it means. He is falling in love with him. No, he is already in love with him. Rajan has always been like that, he falls hard and too fast but one does not control his heart and he is in love with both his amazing wife and her beautiful german lover. He can already hear his father saying he is disgusting and a disgrace. Suddenly, this is too much and he is scared. He gets out of the bed. He can leave now, they might be sad about it but he knows they could be happy without him. He can still walk away from them and try to get a more conventional life, one that his father would approve of. Losing them would break his heart but he could probably survived it. He starts to doubt this, them, whatever it is that is going on here. Are they even in love with him? It’s so easy for them to know what the others feels, they have this connection Rajan will never have. He will never be able to be part of them, not really. He is scared or stupid, he doesn’t know but Rajan thinks that maybe, they would be happier without him. He finds his clothes and gets dress quickly. He leaves a note saying that this last night with them was extraordinary and that he wishes them all the happiness in the world and then, he leaves the room and goes back to the apartment. He wants to pack his bag as soon as possible and leave before he realises he is making a huge mistake. He is about to finish when he hears the door opens. And then, Kala is in the room. When she sees him, she sighs with relief.

« We were afraid I would be too late, she says. »

« Kala, I… »

She doesn’t let him finish before she closes the distance between them and kisses him. After the kiss, she presses her forehead against his. He doesn’t know what to say to her because now that she is in front of her, he isn’t sure he will be ever able to leave.

« My dear husband, » she says. « I’m so sorry. »

He looks at her confused. Why is she sorry?

« I should have listen to Will and talk to you. And to Wolfgang. I was so scared about this conversation that I just kept pushing it back and it’s not fair for either of you. »

« It’s okay Kala. »

« No it’s not. »

She stops talking and she looks like she is trying to find the courage to speak.

« Rajan. I love Wolfgang, you know that. You also know that when we married, I was not in love with you. Even before the cluster, I was always afraid that people would not accept me for who I am, for what I want and I dealt with this by trying to keep my distance with people, because it felt like the easiest solution. The cluster, and Wolfgang in particular help me accept myself for who I am because I literally cannot lie to them. They know me, everything about me, because it comes to them so naturally, just like I know everything about them. It’s so much easier to trust people when you can feels this. And it was always so much easier to be open with Wolfgang because of that, it was so much easier to be myself and vulnerable and to fall in love with him. But you… »

She smiles and one of her hand strokes his cheek.

« My dear, patient, charming husband who can’t read my mind, you kept proving me wrong. Every time I close myself to you because I thought that it would be too much for you and you would leave, you always proved me wrong. You stayed, you show me so much love and acceptance. And I don’t know when it happens exactly, if it was during our honeymoon or our life together or even after you found out about the cluster, but it doesn’t really matter when. What matters is that I fell in love with you. I love Wolfgang and I love you. I love you both, so much, I didn’t think it was possible to love two people that much, but it must be because I do. »

It’s the first time she tells him that she loves him and Rajan want to tell her he loves her too, but he can feel she isn’t done.

« And I really don’t want to assume anything. I though that I would have to choose one of you and it was killing me because the truth is, I don’t want to. But last night made me realised that maybe I didn’t have to. Because I love you both and I really don’t want to make any assumption but I know you love me too and I know that Wolfgang loves me (she looks on her right and smiles after saying that and Rajan realises that Wolfgang is probably here too, maybe they had a similar conversation in the taxi leading her to the apartment). And I think, but I might me wrong because after all I can’t know what you feel the same way I can know for Wolfgang or anyone in the cluster and… »  
She stops talking, looking on her right and says:

« Yes, sorry. I was saying, last night made me realised that maybe, you love Wolfgang too and maybe, we could, the three of us, just… figure this out. Together. »

Rajan knows that he can deny it. Deny his feeling for Wolfgang, like he did his entire life, like he did for Jean-Pierre all those years ago, he can, at this moment, he can still stop this while it’s possible. But Kala is in front of him, looking at him with so much hope in her eyes and that is the moment when Rajan realises he doesn’t want to deny this. He wants this, whatever this might be. He want this relationship, he wants to love them both and be with them, and even who knows, one day have children with them and grows old with them. His father’s voice is still in his head, saying him that this is disgusting, that he should be ashamed but for the first time, he thinks his father is wrong, because there is nothing disgusting or shameful about loving someone and being loved in return, even if this someone is really two persons. He takes a deep breath and says:

« You’re right. I love you and I love him. »

And this is Kala’s body in front of him, her eyes, her face, her skin but this is Wolfgang’s smile on her face. And it’s Kala’s lips that kiss him but he knows it’s Wolfgang who kisses him. And it’s Kala’s voice that whispers in his ears « I love you too » but he knows the words are Wolfgang’s. And then, it’s Kala’s again, really Kala who kisses him and tells him:

« Let’s go. »

She takes his hand and he knows she is taking him back to the hotel, where Wolfgang is probably waiting for them. And when they enter into the suite, Wolfgang is there, smiling at them with this bright smile that Rajan knows has always been for Kala only but now, this smile is also for him. Wolfgang hugs them. And now that he is in their arms, now that he feels safe and warm and loved, Rajan knows that no matter what happens after that, he made the right decision. Because this might be complicated and crazy, his wife being another human being connected to 7 other people on the planet and her having a german lover, him falling in love with her lover too and this relationship, it’s completely crazy and Rajan wouldn’t have it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> Really you guys likes it! 
> 
> Please let me know if you saw any mistakes. English is not my first languages so I did what I could but I might have miss some. 
> 
> As usual, comments are appreciated :D


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